STILL RADIANT

A New Week Begins, 5-10-26

On most days Ruth is seen as the beloved matriarch of our messy, fun loving, blended family. And though we appreciate the countless reasons she has always been the spiritual glue that holds us together through all the ups and downs of life, she’s a lot more than that.

And as much as this may sound like the beginning of a love letter to Ruth, the truth is there is an entire constellation of other shining starts I’ve come to appreciate more and more with each passing year.

On the day Ruth and I were having lunch together at the Tipsy Oak I felt like the luckiest guy on the patio. I’ll admit to loving her hair, which has always been both wild and free. You can see why the woman who cuts it calls it “Boom Boom” hair.

But it’s not just that, her eyes have always had this beguiling combination of both warmth and mischief, along with the kind of smile that makes you feel like you’ve just been let in on something good.

Although she has always had this easy going, live and let live spirit, those who love her also know, she absolutely hates being pressured or told what to do.

When we were dating, over 40 years ago now, a lot of people told her that getting too serious with me would be a mistake. I’m still glad she didn’t listen.

Whenever I come across pictures of our younger days it can still take my breath away, and not because I miss that version of her but because I still recognize her in it.

Today, she is lovelier than ever. The laughter is still quick. The kindness is still there, and so is that irreverent rebel.

And I am glad to say, she is not alone!

Following our wedding, Ruth and I squeezed the last of our belongings into our car and began the drive from Las Vegas to our new home in Simi Valley, California. Of course, our new home was actually a parsonage, which belonged to the church, but we were still excited to begin our first new chapter together.

One of the first people she met was Cathy. Cathy was the Director of the Preschool at the church we were both serving and they soon became good friends.

Cathy is every bit as impressive and captivating as Ruth. In a lot of ways they are very different from each other, but in some of the most important ways, they are like sisters.

They are both resilient. They both laugh easily. And they have both figured out to survive life’s sorrows without losing their joy. It’s a beautiful thing to witness.

I’m also glad to say…. They’re not alone! Because if you spend any time around them, you begin to notice something else, this kind of spirit rarely travels alone.

Meet the Sunflowers!

They’re smart. They’re funny. And though they have given themselves a name that sounds a bit light and airy, they often spend their lunches talking about everything from politics to current events, to the people they know who could use their help and prayers too.

They have a lot of fun together and when they laugh it’s often the kind that turns heads two tables over. But if you listen closely, you’ll also be able to hear equal parts mischief and wisdom bouncing around the table.

To all my fellow guys out there, I wish I knew their secret, because over the years I’ve noticed how more and more of us are getting a bit grumpier and even depressed. And to be perfectly honest with you, there are days when I worry about that happening to me.

That’s just one of the reasons why I am so thankful for Ruth and her friends and all the other ladies in my life right now. Because I’m turning 70 this year, most of them are also getting older, but you know what? I’m a huge fan!

They have moxie, confidence, charisma, whimsy, sass, you name it. I see it every week! At church, at my local Y, on the pickleball courts, the softball fields and at home. And most impressive of all… I can’t think of a single one who feels sorry for herself.

You don’t need me to lay out all the different ways that our youth obsessed culture can make them feel invisible, but on this Mother’s Day, I would like to point out….

You don’t have to be a mother to think of what made your own mother beautiful, both inside and out. As Roger Rosenblatt recently put it…

“They are all stars, winking lights in the universe.”

Plus, you don’t have to be a mother in order to honor and give thanks for all the other women you know right now who in their own unique way are helping to make this world of ours a better, kinder, wiser place for us all.

And so to all of them, which includes many of you: Thank you! Thank you for showing us what grit and humor and endurance looks like. And thank you for showing us the kind of love that refuses to fade.

To paraphrase Paul Simon: I couldn’t be happier or more grateful that you are…. Still radiant. Still radiant. Still Radiant… After all these years!

And Maybe… Now More Than Ever!

Johnny B ++

ENDNOTE

Apologies to Judy for using one of the Sunflower pics when you were unavailable. They tell me you were on some kind of “Mission” but it wouldn’t be the first time they’ve told me a whopper!

And on a personal note

A great big thanks for all the support I’ve received this week following my knee surgery. In addition to the phone calls and messages, we also received some amazing treats. Most of all, we’ve appreciated your prayers. My recovery has been progressing along slowly but surely.

Right now I’m still walking like Walter Brennan

And if you’ve forgotten how funny that looks, treat yourself to this clip from Rio Bravo. Ruth has been doing most of the heavy lifting, but here’s the good news, if we should suddenly find ourselves in a gunfight, I’ve also been practicing my Walter Brennan lines…

“I brung ye some dynee mite!”